Humbled

I felt like a rug had been swept under me when not once but twice I hadn't  gotten a job offer.
If anything I needed to revaluate the way I had been interviewing and fix it.

Fix this loss of words and the way my brain would completely blank when it came to answering the most important question to this job application.

To be quite honest, I see what I want to do and I can't seem to get my skills there because of how distracted I am and putting everyone else before me.

Thats the funny thing about unemployment, you're absolutely dying to see what else is out there but also knowing that you ultimately need to be realistic about where you'd applying to.

I knew I was in trouble when it took three days to hear back, the swell of hopelessness replacing the smugness of telling myself it was meant to be.

Truth was, I think we all have to be able to royaly mess up and this is my era. This is me at one of my lowest since highschool. Truthfully however, no matter how much I hate myself, starve myself. I still have to pay rent. I still need a reason to get out of bed in the morning and see shiny new faces of potential future employees. Dropping friends names, isn't going to help and I have to be able to understand the mechanics of describing what I do or else i'm wasting my time.